Love Despite Faults

"I found a love in me, I always somehow knew that it existed.

 It just needed to be set free."

                                                 ~Relient K

~Love Despite Faults~

Borrowed from Wordpress.com

What does it mean to live for the world?

It means nothing, nothing at all.

Do we put God above everything else?

Or does the world look better than an end of light and song?

It is my job to be a stone tablet to the world.

I am here to bring salt to the bland.

To be more for God and less for me.

And to be a desire for good and not evil.

As this world grows towards a place absent from truth,

The true believers will be brought out.

Standing for good,

Standing and singing, proclaiming, and dying.

What does He want from us?

He wants us to love Him,

Love Him with all that is in us.

He wants us to listen to him even in the bustle and in the quiet. 

It is not my job to condemn the lost.

I am here to love despite peoples faults.

I am to love like Christ loves

Because I am not perfect either. 

Candy and Roses or Loaves and Fishes

"There's faith and there's sleep. We need to pick one please because faith is to be awake and to be awake is for us to think and for us to think is to be alive and I will try with every rhyme to come across like I am dying to let you know you need to try and to think."

                                                                                          ~Twenty-One-Pilots

~Candy and Roses or Loaves and Fishes~

Miracles and faith. 

Healing and death. 

Making a point by being more than selfish. 

Being more than what they want you to be. 

Glimpses of glory. 

Glimpses of the miraculous. 

Making disciples out of dust.  

And not following what they want you to follow.

Fear of what we do not understand. 

Going back to what we were before. 

Even when the truth is right under our eyes. 

Even when the miraculous is in front of our lives. 

They look our way and hate what we say. 

Beaten down and left for dead. 

Bruised then killed for Love. 

Faith rising up stronger than before.

Instead of sleeping let us live.

Instead of denying the truth be strong and sing until it hurts.

Sing a song that glorifies the faithful. 

Until death takes its toll,  naturally or by their hands. 

What is the cost of discipleship? 

Is it candy and roses? 

Is it loaves and fishes? 

Is it loving yourself more than true Love?

None of these things are discipleship. 

It is following Love more than others. 

It is giving people loaves and fishes.

It is a contradiction to the norms of this world and adopting the norms of the other side.

There is a cost to following truth. 

An alienation of stock footage. 

A more perfect way of dying to yourself.

Allowing oneself to understand that life will never be free from conflict. 

A bullet is in my left hand, and a broken watch in the other. 

What do I use to understand miracles? 

What do I use to solve conflict. 

The bullet or the broken watch.

Is it possible to use one for the other? 

Can both work for the good of the lost? 

If the watch was working would it be any better? 

Or is faith enough for time to be washed away?

Is it possible to fire the bullet without the gun?

Can both be used to kill unbelief? 

If the bullet does not penetrate can it still be understood? 

Or is faith enough for miracles to happen?

I cannot take you with me. 

But I can try and show you what it means to be free. 

Only Love can save me or you. 

Only the truth can make you see the gleam.

My works do not create miracles. 

My death does not let you die too. 

It costs more than doing a good work. 

It costs your life.

It costs giving up this world for the other. 

To be persecuted and beaten. 

Diving into the deep from way up high. 

To be divisive and to look at glory for more than doctrine. 

But to look and really see what it means to be dirty and then washed clean. 

Scheduling My Trip to Mars

"The power of youth is on my mind. Sunsets, small town, I'm out of time.

Will you still love me when I shine, from words but not from beauty?"

~Lana Del Rey

~Scheduling My Trip to Mars~

I plan to schedule conflict.

To go to my calendar and find out when I will fight with you.

Three days from today I will fight.

I will fight about how I am worth more than me.

I plan to mark down another day to fall apart.

A day where I fall to my knees.

Seven days from today I will break.

I will break to show how I need to die before I can grow.

This life is a series of events strung together by multicolored threads.

Woven strands making a tapestry of grace filled holes.

An imperfect form and delivery.

A colorful representation of the pain and beauty of this world. 

September second seems like a good day to smile.

It does not look to interfere with any other activities this year.

I wonder if the smile should come with a laugh?

Or should it happen and then pass, to move onto sadder things? 

The landscape escapes the mere mention of my name.

The grass grows and turns from green to brown.

The rolling hills move horizontally in a world that wants to sink.

Digging craters to make it to Mars seems okay to me. 

A flower is near these hands.

With the dirt caking my fingers as I dig.

Staring at its hues I smash it into the ground and tell it to grow again.

To dig is to reach a destination that may not be scheduled.

I plan to put down a day to open my mouth in a musical fashion.

A day to express with more than written word. 

Ten years from now seems to be a good day to sing.

I mark down the day, but deciding if the song is happy or sad is another few days away.

Deciding to sing is harder than deciding to dig.

For Mars is closer than Home.

For Home is farther and further and all the in between. 

Deciding to dig is a lot easier to do than to engage in a meaningful way. 

When I arrive on Mars I will take a rocket to the moon.

For Mars has the means to build imagination days.

And when I reach the moon I will look to the Earth,

And realize I smiled a day early.

A day early or a day too late.

A time to throw away the schedule and go with what is today.

To engage in the color and accept the holes.

To forgive this world of its imperfection and learn to live with what I have been given. 

Paychecks and T-Shirts

"I fell in love and all I got was a t-shirt."
                                      ~Me and Kiley

~Paychecks and T-Shirts ~

All of my surroundings offer me an attempt to ruin my life.

A single illumination gives me a chance at a better worth.

Being snarky and letting people in.

Letting my head become more than my body.

Filling up and becoming more arrogant.

To deflate is to have faith and to have faith is to let pride fall. 

But all I do is whine about money.

All I do is wish for paychecks and t-shirts. 

Trying to be the best and trying to be better than the world.

When all you need is to let your pride die and be invited into the sky.

Photographs taken of those that are ahead.

And legs chopped off at the knees of those who linger behind. 

We stand in line and wait for our names to be called.

We wait and stand still looking at the sky and maybe some one might fall. 

We stare at the sky where the power is the strongest.

We try to be at the top by kindling a fire that consumes our goodness.

But the fall is more dangerous if you arrive and then plummet before your time. 

For the climb is worth more if you do it with you and love side by side. 

Looking down upon those that we deem unworthy.

Instead of loving them for being a creation in this world. 

I wish to fight for my right to die well.

I wish to die at the appointed time knowing I lived not by me but by Love.

I guess we transition into a story of sorts.

A story of a man and his struggles in this world we call. for some reason, home. 

One day I was walking and before me was a wall.

This wall was higher than even the clouds.

On the other side of the wall was something I needed.

I wondered if it was another pay day for me?

One day I was walking and before me was a wall.

And I thought this was the end of the journey I was on.

One day I wept before the wall.

I cried out to anything that was listening. 

I chose to be below what I thought I deserved.

And then the wall crumbled to the ground and let me pass.

One day later I was walking and before me was a taller wall.

I then realized life was worth living for the wall made me stronger.

Well I will end it here.

I will end it in a hopeful note about Love and not giving into pride.

But remember this is life,

And life is an unpredictable mess.

A mess we all must cross if we are to achieve more than a paycheck or t-shirt. 

Stop Playing the Game

"Your eyes are closed when you're prayin.' You sing out aloud with the band. You shine up your shoes for services. There's blood on your hands. You turned your back on the homeless, and the ones that don't fit in your plan. Quit playin' religion games there's blood on your hands." 

                                                ~Jon Foreman

Blood has been shed.

It has been shed for you and for me.  

A real sacrifice for the real lost. 

A real death for real love.

And what am I doing about it?  

Am I condemning those that need help?

Do I grasp onto religion and ignore the poor? 

These games we play destroy the love we need to show to all. 

On the side of the road there is a man who longs for freedom. 

In the parking lot people gather to just feel something.  

The hotel is full of beings trying to fill a whole that was never there. 

And in the office there is a man who lost it all and when he hits the floor it is done. 

And there you are sitting in a pew watching it go down.

You are saying,  "Look at me,  I am good.  I am doing my religious duty." 

And there you are hearing the pleas. 

As you drive by to go gorge yourself on food and drink. 

You are perfect in every way.

You go to church and claim to pray. 

You lift your hands and surrender to yourself. 

But those around see it as a man surrendering to God.

You sit down after the song and listen like a good boy.  

You hear the words and then go about your day. 

When someone asks what you believe you think and say, "I believe in Love." 

But you do not think about God until you break the plane of that Church again on Sunday.

You are the perfect Christian in the eyes of you. 

You help the church by complaining about the lights being too bright.

You help by saying the music is not self fulfilling enough. 

You help be walking in the door.

Me, me, me, you sing, as you sing, as you sing.

I wish, I wish, I wish,  they sing, as they sing, as they sing. 

Food, shelter, clothes, I wish, I wish, I wish. 

As they sing,  outside your neighborhood watching you be perfect day in and day out.

Blood has been shed. 

By my savior and in the church. 

His blood does good yours is full of venom. 

Blood has been shed.

What are we doing for the one who died? 

Are we playing a game? 

Or are we practicing what we are praying? 

What are we doing for the one we claim to love.

If we love him we should be like him. 

If we love him pray and actually pray. 

Sing and actually sing. 

Leave church and practice what you have heard. 

You will go against the grain of this world. 

You will be mocked and hurt. 

You will swim up a stream. 

Who cares, love anyway and and never cease to do and pray. 

Where do You Suffer?

"You're my harbor in this lonely storm."
                                             ~Jon Foreman

Where do You Suffer?

Rejoice in the suffering brought to you by those who do not understand.

Suffer and become strong.

But do not suffer by doing wrong,

Suffer in the pain of Christ.

What am I doing when I see those who are dying?

What am I doing when they are in danger?

Do I shut up in my home and never leave?

Or do I go out to where they are and show them love?

I am stubborn I am a faker.

I long for a home that I cannot see.

I am boat lost at sea.

And everyday you see right through me.

I refuse blessings when He lays them right in front of my eyes.

I end up suffering not by Him, but because of me.

The hurt builds up like a chemical reaction in a bottle.

Until it explodes and my heart is on the floor.

The time will come when this world will be reborn.

My maker will come down and all will see the truth.

Until that day I will be all I can for Him.

I will be all I can to show the world His love.

For true love can only come through God.

True love can only be embraced by understanding His suffering.

Even when I doubt, He does not abandon.

Even when I suffer by my own accord He brings me back.

When darkness is over your eyes,

And the stabs of this world pierce your skin.

When the eyes look and linger just a little too much,

And then your world falls apart.

Remember there is a hope if you just turn to the Maker of all things.

Thank God for Another Day

"I'm a goner, somebody catch my breath. I wanna be known by you."
                                                                          ~Twenty One Pilots

~Thank God for Another Day~

Who am I looking for in the bramble and weeds?

What motivation am I using to get through the woods?

Who is on the other side of this long walk?

What do I seek, in the dark, in the dank air of the desecrated sanctuary?

Twisting, crooked vines,

Snatching my arms and legs.

Scraping my skin as I struggle to get out.

Being pulled to the ground trying to find my way.

My failings make me who I am.

But I need to be thankful even when I am lost.

It is hard to see where I am.

But I still need to thank God for another day.

Breaking free but not by me.

Continuing my journey to the sea.

I am glad I did not flee.

And I thank God for taking me in my need. 

Learning how to fall.

Learning how to die.

Learning how to repent. 

Learning how to live in this prison of mine.

Knocked down on the floor and loving it

Beaten but not taken out. 

Hurt by men who see what I have. 

As I hold my head up high and see the woods before my feet. 

On the other side is the salt and water.

On the other side is soil to plant new seeds.

On the other side are chains being broken.

But for now I am thanking God for another day.

Grieving for those that do not understand.

Praying for those that do not look or see.

Walking in this thorn filled woods.

Hoping to grab more to walk and ride with me.

Take heart and use your guilt to repent. 

Denying the pleasures of the world's grief.

Seek the path through the woods.

And then look up take heart and thank God for another day.