Monday, December 15, 2014

Giving it All Away

"These bones are like maps and keys, where they took their hits, and they felt those teeth. There's a story hidden underneath. If you dig in deep, will you find relief?"
                                                                                              ~Dashboard Confessional


~Giving it All Away~



Everything I have I give it all away.
The world wants and wants.
It wants what will destroy it. 
Everything I have I give it all away.

Break my heart and make me whole.
Break my spirit and give me life.
Break me down and show me a way.
Break me down to pieces and reconstruct me today.

What is the will in the world?
What desires do they cherish?
Riches, sex, and pride.
What is the will of this world?

I wish to understand more and more everyday.
Let me learn to love the loveless and hope for the hopeless.
I do not want the material this place has to offer.
I want riches of the spiritual, the ones that will last.

What are the priorities you keep?
What do you model for the ones around?
Is it filled with things made out of gold?
Or is it filled with the love that will save your soul?

Even if this world is against me.
Even if they do not agree,
I will love them anyway.
For love may light their way.

What does this world cherish?
What do they think will save their lives?
How does a church treat those around.
Do they only feed the poor for a spotlight?

Does happiness save you?
Does sex save you?
Does pleasure not last for only a moment?
What does the world lean on?

I give it all to you. 
With all that I have, nothing compares to your love. 
Everything I have I offer it up. 
My spirit will turn to ash unless I rely on love and not this world.

Everything I have I give it all away.
Lead me and teach me.
Help me lean on you.
Let me love you just an ounce of how much you love me.
Help me be more like you.

Friday, December 12, 2014

Orchestrating my Life


"Two blackbirds on a highway sign
Are laughing at me at four in the morning
They played the war drum out of time
So I'm not sure where I've been marching
I wanna be strong, but it's not easy anymore
I'm hoping I'm wrong." 

                                       ~ The Wonder Years


~Orchestrating my Life~

Here I am, a piano constantly playing in my head.
Am I alright, am I going to make it out alive?
Here I am, a drum beating to the rhythm of my heart.
Am I alright, am I going to make it out alive.

This is the way my mind devours the thoughts that enter it.
This is the way my body tells me something is wrong. 
This is the way I feel, when coming home from work at night.
The day will bring the day and the night will bring the morning.

It is 3 A.M. and I am up staring at the wall.
Pondering if I messed up?
Here I am dissecting the potency of my life's trajectory.
Too cold for a blanket, and the thermostat can't go any higher.
Personally, I would just like someone to hold.

Here I am the symphony of waves crashing into my ears.
Am I alright, am I going to make it out alive?
Here I am a steady stream of strings serenading my soul.
Am I alright, am I going to make it out alive? 

This is the way the call has depleted my strength.
This is the way my legs decide to buckle.
This is the way I feel, when coming back on a Sunday afternoon.
The day will bring the day and the night will bring the morning.

The night brings too much time to think.
The dark takes hold and ushers in over-thinking.
Is the water still flowing from the sink,
Where I get the drink to try and overcome my restless soul? 
Personally, I would rather have someone to hold.

Did I do something to deserve this loss?
Did the sunrise forget the wind?
Did the sunset forget its colors?
Did the night sky forget to tell my story?
Did I forget to thank the stars?
Did this world decide to play a cosmic joke?

This is the moment where precipitation falls in a movie.
This is the moment where the band plays a c-minor.
This is the way a story is supposed to unfold.
The day will bring the day and night will bring the morning.

I long for understanding.
I long for solitude from my own mind.
I long for this mini pity party to end.
The pathetic nature of my own personal worlds' smallest violin.

Strength and courage are a luxury to me.
Trying and failing feels like the norm.
The bad days seem to outweigh the good, even if I do not feel sad.
For hope only takes me so far.

But I still pray for a day where my hope pays off.
A day that does not forget to bring colors to the sky.
I pray for a night that is filled with star light.
A night that shows me signs to illuminate my way. 

All I want is someone to talk to at times like these.
A person who is there for me and I can be there for them.
A person to help transform and reform the matters of the heart. 
Personally, I would just like someone to hold.
Personally, I would just like someone to love. 

Sunday, December 7, 2014

Torches Meet Joy...Joy Meet Torches

"Let's set this city ablaze.We'll burn down the monuments and build mountains in our place.
We could see everything. We could start a fire and all shine in it's light. Shine so bright we burn in eyes and heal the stories ending. this is the last time we will ever bleed to feel alive."

                                                                                                    ~Further Seems Forever

 


Torches Meet Joy...Joy Meet Torches



I am not defeated.
I am not the one who will lose.
I have a hope,
And I am sticking with it.

In this world we will have hardships.
In this world some will not like you.
Times may not be kind,
But loves' words still rings true.

May joy be in our hearts.
And let our voices rise up and sing of glory.
Let the music play the songs of Heaven.
And may our lives reflect the love shown to us by the one and true.

I am not to be taken down.
I am to stand strong.
I am not to wobble to the floor.
And I will not be shaken.

For God is above all that we are.
For God delivers joy.
Happiness will never do.
For happiness is determined by happenstance.

It is time to lay down our pride and be humble.
It is time to strike a match and light up this world.
I want to start a fire that lights up this place.
I want to burn down the hypocrites and force them to be real.

When did hope become a luxury?
When did this world rob us of our joy?
Take up the torch and burn down the unkind heart.
Use the fire to illuminate the dark that has taken over the city.

I am not defeated.
I am not the one who will lose.
Take up the torch and burn bright for joy.
Take up the torch and show the world what joy really means.

Sunday, November 30, 2014

Above All

"Cause the God I believe in never worked on a campaign trail."

                                                                                              ~Brand New 


~Above All~



People want to take away the truth from the world around us.
Words are being twisted and used for unholy acts. 
Words are being spliced together for attacks. 
They want to take the truth away from the world around us.

I want to be clear and concise.
I want the world to hear the news about the other side.
I want to believe more than doubt.
I want to be alive and fill the world with news of glory and joy.

Sadly, they want to shut down true love.
They want words to be equal and universal.
This book can get me to heaven and that book will do too.
They want everything and everyone to get them to glory.

They want to twist my words.
They want to take what I say and dismiss it with a turn of a cheek.
They want me to shut my mouth.
They want to belong to nothing or everything at once. 

But I am just a man.
I am not higher than you.
I am not above you, boasting that I am mighty.
I am just a man who wants you to know the truth.

I will fail
But at times I can succeed.
I need to tell you the truth.
So you can see that the reward is great.

Search and run.
Listen and be still.
Search and seek out the love that transcends time and space.
Listen, even when nothing seems to be going on.

They are taking away the truth from the world around us.
I am going down a path that does not apologize for its hardships.
They are taking away the truth from the world around us.
I am speaking even when they want me to stop.

I will die,
I will sacrifice this world for a love that rises above all.
I am not above all,
But I know one who is.

So, do you believe in miracles?
Do you believe God is the same God from long ago?
So, do you want the news that was spoken?
Do you believe the word given to us? 

It is the word that they want me to be quiet about.
I do not want the pleasures this world offers me. 
I want to rise up and do good for those who are unloved.
I do not want the worlds words growing inside my mind.
I want to take up my mat and walk, rejoicing, singing, and dancing.
I want to speak truths into lives that are unholy,and loveless.

To speak to those who think they deserve nothing.
Speak up, stand up, and pick up your mat and love.
For love is above this world. 
Love is what will save us all. 

Sunday, November 23, 2014

To Hell

“There are moments when even to the sober eye of reason, the world of our sad humanity may assume the semblance of Hell. ” 
                                                                                         ― Edgar Allan Poe


~To Hell~

As I watch and see him, I wonder what I can do.
I see him travel down a path that is so broad. 
I see him travel down a path I do not wish to follow. 
As I watch and see him, I wonder should I do something for him?

I am lazy.
I am not strong.
I see his need and smile as if the need is not there.
I see his final destination and it does not motivate me.

To Hell and never back again.
A highway with only one exit.
A place where even light does not stay.
To Hell, to Hell!

Why am I so calloused?
Why do I seem not to care?
To Hell!
Should I try and get to him before he goes?

We drink and are merry with our brothers.
But we see the men who will not see glory and we do nothing to help.
To Hell!
Why do we do nothing?

The man lives his life not knowing he is gone.
He has never heard what I know.
To Hell!
I never tell.

He is ready to hear.
He is ready to receive.
To glory!
He is ready, but speak no words.

My compassion is gone.
My empathy is dead.
My laziness becomes my life.
My mind is telling me to stand still.

He will die.
He will fall.
I did nothing.
I just lived.

To Hell!
To Glory!
There can be Hell on Earth 
My eyes blinded by my own contentment.

As I watch my eyes begin to look sway.
"He has plenty of time." I say
"Someone else will get to him." I convince myself.
As I watch, I decide to walk away.

I am the man that you saw, and I saw you walk away.
I am the man that you thought had time.
I died that day.
I died by a car that was out to play.

Why did you not help me?
Why did you turn away?
To Hell!
Where is the glory?

Where is the water I need for relief?
Where is the food I crave?
I thought death would be the most pain I have ever felt.
I thought the Earth was the last place would ever live.
I was wrong, and nobody told me I would end up this way. 

All I see is death and tainted fame.
All I feel is nothingness and pain.
Why did you not warn me?
Why did you not care?
Why did you keep the truth bottled inside your soul?

To Hell, to Hell I wish you will never go.
That car, that day.
Why did you not pray?
To Hell, to Hell I wish you will never go.
That car that day.
Why did you decide not to stay?
Why did you turn you head and walk away?

Wednesday, November 19, 2014

Death Works for Love



And so I arrive at the conclusion 
Love isn't made 
Love doesn't sell or pay 
But we buy and sell our love away.
                        ~Jon Foreman




~Death Works for Love~


Never underestimate true love.
Never deter your thoughts away from the death that encompasses true love.
Love takes over the soul when the individual lets go to the one who stops the storm.
Never fail to seek true compassion even when it all seems lost.

Saints turn a blind eye when everything is alright.
But they come crawling back when they are beat to the ground.
God is not a get out of jail free card.
He deserves love and honor no matter where you are in this life.

Use yourself for more than personal gain.
Use yourself to build up others.
Treat those around you with the respect love deserves.
Use trust as a means to encapsulate a heart to what true love is.

And what is this true love?
What is this word that we use to describe what food we think is the best?
What is this word that we throw around, making it slowly fade in its potency?
What is this true love?

We fight for love.
We sing about love.
Dying to love and hoping we get it right.
We write about this word that is gradually losing its meaning.

This life demands real love.
It demands that we turn our lives over to what was done for us.
There was a death that shows what true love is.
There was metal and wood that caused blood, death, and deliverance.

I want a world that lives in those scars.
I want a world driven by that loves example.
A world not dominated by entitlement.
I want a world led by example of this true love.

Love so pure that words cannot truly describe it.
A love that hurts and heals at the same time.
Love so pure that my heart turns to it in everything.
A love treated by blood to make my soul white and whole.

What is true love?
It is fire burning away my calloused soul.
It is water washing me clean.
It is snow falling as a blanket keeping me warm at night.
It is blood, sweat, and death that rises up and creates true understanding.
It is an understanding that saves a life.

Never underestimate true love.
The love that this world can never provide.
Never underestimate true love.
Embrace it and embrace the rest of your life.

Sunday, November 16, 2014

My Personal Psalm

EliElilama sabachthani?” that is,My GodMy Godwhy have You forsaken Me?”
                                                                     ~Matthew 26:46b 



~My Personal Psalm~


What does it look like when you love and the world hates?
What does it look like when the change is a change for the suffering?
The world tears down the loving because it hates the one who shows true love.

This world is not my own.
This world is only temporary.
This world will hurt you just because we know the truth.

Not everyone will like you.
Not everyone will want to know you.
But stay strong, walk the path and love.

Those around want to avoid the truth. 
They want the easy and the fast.
They want the quick fix for this world and this world alone.

This world is not my home, my home begins when I die.  
My treasure is on the other side.
My treasure begins on the rocky and narrow.

I do not want a cookie cutter life.
I do not want the easy way out.
I want the love of a Savior even when I think He is gone.

God I cry out to you.
Give me life in this world where I live.
God I cry out to you.

My knees are on the ground.
My eyes are to the sky.
But my heart is cold.

God I cry out to you.
I wish I knew more.
God I cry out to you.

My head tells me you forsake me.
My ears do not hear.
God why do I feel nothing all the time?

I weep as I sit alone.
I weep as I try to serve.
I am wounded because I do not feel you.

This war is made up of many battles.
This war, thank God, is already won.
But this war takes a toll on my soul.

This world does not belong to me.
I am just living in it with others. 
We do not belong here.

Break me and let me know you.
Hurt me so I understand compassion.
God please let me see you again.

This world is built on vanity.
It is built on meaningless pleasure.
This world is what my sin wants.

I give in to many times.
I give in when I know it is wrong.
I give in, God help me fix my eyes on you.

What does it look like to love what the world hates? 
It hurts,
It stings,
It destroys my understandings.

What does it look like to love what the world hates?
It brings hope it.
It brings love.
It brings understanding.

What does it look like to love God?
It looks like the end of an age.
An end of humanity.
A beginning that will last forever.
An end to this world and a focus on what is to come.

This world is not my own
Even when I feel alone.
God I weep,
God I try,
God take me, let me know you are here.

This world is not my home
This world is broken.
I am broken.
I am a faith based lover
Known to my soul as a believer in more than myself.

Not everyone will like you.
Not everyone will like me.
But I will love them not matter the circumstances.
Even when my world has fallen apart.

Sunday, November 9, 2014

Serve

What good will it be for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul? Or what can anyone give in exchange for their soul? Matthew 16:26

~Serve~


Pride will kill us all.
It can consume and twist until you are unrecognizable. 
Pride will kill us all.
It can take us, bind us, and turn you away from what you believe in.

We grasp onto our failures and let them define who we are.
We take hold to our success and we let it define who we are.
But who are we really?
What is the big thing that drives us to be who we are?

What do you believe in?
What makes you tick?
What causes you to wake up in the morning?
What defines you?

Sex will not fulfill your soul.
Drugs will not poison enough to make you feel whole. 
Money will not make you charitable.
And a lover will only show you so much true love.

There is a book that holds my sins.
There is a book that shows my good deeds.
One of these books is bigger than the other.
But there is another book with another story that saves my soul and makes one of the books disappear.

There is a life that I must use to define me.
There is a man who died but did not leave.
There is a place that I strive to enter.
There is a book that prepares me for battle against the idols in my life.

Why would we follow anyone else?
Who else takes away the shackles and the chains?
Why would you go for pride over the maker?
When the maker is the one who saves.

What can I do for my creator?
What can I give to show him my love?
Truthfully not much.
But I do anyways because I want to be more like him.

Do not grasp onto what others have.
For those things will not let you inherit the kingdom. 
Do not use our maker as a crutch. 
For he is the one that needs to be served when the sun is up and when the sun sets.

Serve and let the good news be north on your radar.
Serve and want to.
Serve and fight for your brothers soul.
Serve and love others.
For God does not fail, even when we do.

Sunday, November 2, 2014

Do We Live for the Proper Reason?

"So choose your last words, this is the last timeCause you and I, we were born to die." ~Lana Del Rey

Do We Live for the Proper Reason?



Born to live does not seem correct to me.
Being born to live seems like a poor way to live. 
Born to suffer, born to work, born to find love sounds like a better option to me.

We go through life wanting to live.
We want the materials to keep us filled.
Happiness is not connected to this life.
It is connected to the eternal death.

Born to love.
Born to die.
Being born to live does not sound good to me.

A child is alive and they live to die. 
A child shows us what joy is all about.
A child's light is brighter than any cynic we call an adult.
A child knows no bounds and dives in with trust and love.

This life is not our life.
This world is not our home.
Our home is on the other side, so live to die.

Children laugh and children cry.
Children are gifts that show us how we once were.
Dedicate your children with truth.
Dedicate your children, so they may grow and tell the truth as they live for the other side.

I believe in love.
I believe in birth and resurrection. 
I believe in lost causes being shown the way through children's eyes.

We are all born, we all will die.
We do not all live. 
We go through life sitting down and not running forward. 
Get up be a child and lose your life in truth, in love, in a child's eye.

We need to live to learn to die. 
But traditional living will not do.
My living will be one that is focused on my death. 
Focused on love, on lost souls, on living by doubting doubts.

Pray and be still.
Pray for your soul.
And look at life with child's eyes.

Go out to battle and die in the proper fashion. 
With hope in your eyes and love in your heart.
Doubt your doubts and live with the other side in mind.

Monday, October 27, 2014

Even If You Do Not Seek

"I like to listen. I have learned a great deal from listening carefully. Most people never listen."                ~Ernest Hemingway


~Even If You Do Not Seek~

Protect and be still.
A boundary made by love and not by hate.

Am I in a cage when the rules are put in place?
Or are they placed in my life out of love?

We seek immediate gratification.
When we should be looking to the eternal.

Stars light my way and sing songs of hope.
They protect and point me in the right direction.

Humanity illuminated by selfishness.
And our pride can take us out.

Death will come to every man.
What will you do while you are here?

Listening to the eternal one can be hard.
But if it is done lives will be free.

The road is hard.
But the reward is great.

Pray and be still.
Listen and wait.
Love will live even if you do not seek. 

Monday, October 20, 2014

Who Are You?




"Fear and faith have something in common: they both believe in a future that hasn't happened yet."            ~Unknown

     Who Are You?


It hurts to be free.
It hurts to be alive.
I see the miraculous, yet I still struggle to stay clean.

It has to be you.
The one that answers my prayers.
Why then do I doubt you?

Sometimes I need to reach out and grab love.
Instead of waiting for love to come to me.
Faith can make you well, but I still doubt.

Who is this man you raises people from the dead?
Who is the one that fills my thirsty soul?
How come I know the answer, but I still ask the question?

It hurts to believe.
It hurts to know the truth.
It hurts because I do not belong here.

My home is not this world.
My home has representation that can actually get work done.
My home is not limited by time.

Who are you?
Why do you do the things you do?
Why do you love me?

It is easier to know God than to believe He loves me.
Who are you God?
Why do I doubt you when you always pull through?

The Earth moves around a sun.
My world revolves the true son.
I am sorry for my wrongdoings when I fall and think that the physical is worth more than love.

I live my life and wish I did it better.
I live my life to serve love and others.
A metaphor for sacrifice is what I wish to show.

I go through seasons.
I follow myself sometimes instead of the truth.
I go through seasons all the time.

I sweat and feel the burn of the risen Son.
As I move and try so hard, yet I fall anyway.
The snow covers me and lets me know I can be free once more. 
Until I spring up and grow in the name of the love you have shown.

It hurts when you run away.
It hurts when we hide instead of pray.
It hurts, but I would not trade it for anything. 


Another day to doubt.
Another day to believe. 
Another day to have my sins washed away.

Sunday, October 12, 2014

What a Strange Question

"We all live with the objective of being happy; our lives are all different and yet the same"
                ~Anne Frank



~What a Strange Question~

Are we good?
Are we good when we are born?
Are we good as we grow?
I do not think so.

We are broken hearted people.
We are sinners to the core.
Our lives are handed to us when we are born.
Out bodies are dead the moment we first breathe.

We are rooted to this world before we learn to speak.
We travel in the dark.
We travel into the shadows .
We try to navigate based on ourselves and we fail...most of the time.

Ultimately we do not deserve life or love.
We do not think we need to seek out something different. 
Even when our insides are screaming for second life.
Even when we have the moments where we feel no hole but are just living.

I know there must be something more.
I know there must be something worth fighting for.
I know my insides could be brought to life. 
I know it is easier to doubt than to believe.

Are we good?
What a strange question.
Do we deserve love?
Do we deserve the sacrifice?
Are we good?

Sunday, October 5, 2014

This is About True Love

Whatever good things we build end up building us.
                                                                    ~Jim Rohn

~This is About True Love~

This is a matter of blood.
This is a matter of the heart.
This is my body being a vessel that means nothing.
This is my body longing for the other side.

I walk, then I run.
I slow down and crash.
I get hurt, I get wronged. 
I have  hope,  even when I feel alone.

The world falls down on top of me.
The world is allowed to try and tempt me. 
But even when I get taken aback
I am never alone.

Here are my hands 
Here are my feet
Here is my heart
Take them for the glory of pain.

For pain is used to build up the soul.
The hurt is used to show what love truly is.
My world can fall apart.
My world can be rebuilt.

Life takes us through renovations.
It takes its toll when the wall gets taken down.
When the foundation is rattled
We think all is lost.

Our houses need to be built on a real surface. 
Our houses need to be cleaned. 
To be washed and scrubbed and made new again.
To be made better even if it must be destroyed first.

Love takes our times of need.
It snatches them up to be used for good. 
It grasps them, then lets them go for help.
We can show love  to others when we know what it feels like to not be loved.

This is a matter of blood.
This is a matter of the heart. 
This is a matter of turning adversity into beauty.
This is about true love.

Sunday, September 28, 2014

We Will Always Have Storms

Hello hurricane, you're not enough
Hello hurricane, you can't silence my love
I've got doors and windows boarded up
All your dead end fury is not enough
You can't silence my love, my love

                                                  ~Switchfoot
 





~We Will Always Have Storms~

The waves crash and the waves seem to be hunting me.
I want to feel, I want to use these waves to let love flow through me.
Trouble comes, the lightning flashes and instead of love we flee.
This idol of prosperity needs to be broken down and taken away from me.

Things of this world will not save you.
Your car, your house, your objects will not bring you life.
Do not hold onto these things when trouble comes.
Go to love, go to the Master, no matter what storm comes your way.

We all reach to the other side.
We all want to know the truth.
There is only one road worth taking.
That road is filled with strife and hardships, but it is also filled with love.

Water is over my head killing me.
Water is over my head washing me clean.
Who do I put my trust in?
Who do I show my love?

If this world is not our home,
Why then do we think that struggles will not come unto us?
If our body is only temporary,
Why then do we think it will not feel pain?

Where is our faith?
Who do we put  our trust in?
Where is our hope?
Who is the one you look to when times get hard?

A storm is always on its way.
A storm will always be there to knock you down.
If you think just because you know God, they will not come,
Then you do not  know the ways of God.

Waves are crashing.
The storm is coming.
Hope is broken
But my faith will not be shaken.

Let the storm come.
Let the storm wreck my life.
Hold my hand and carry me through.
No matter the storm I will believe.

Sunday, September 21, 2014

What Has Been Spoken to You

"In worship, God imparts himself to us." 
                                                       ~ C.S.Lewis



~What Has Been Spoken to You~

Do you hear the voice that is pure?
Do you stop to listen?
Do you believe and let  your soul be washed clean?
Or do you run and not listen to the good  news? 

In this life there is sorrow,
There is doubt,
There is pain,
Let these things be used to glorify God.

You may see, but you do not hear.
You may hear, but you do not see.
Take what you have seen and what you have heard and use it for God. 
Show the love He has shown you.

How do you show the things that God has given to you?
Do you sit on your gifts and say maybe tomorrow?
Or do you go out and live every day?
Go out and use all you have gained to love those  who are not loved.

Are you truly living?
Are you truly listening?
Is your heart filled?
Go out and live your life based on what God has spoken to you.